A Shot in the Dark

O ne of the best gifts about writing is looking back on an old post and seeing how far you've come from the last mental spillage to the world. I look at  my last entry as a milestone in my life, because I truly started to live after I wrote "I am Gay" to the abyss of the world wide web. That milestone will never be reduced in my mind, and the thought of being so visible doesn't really bother me as much as it use to. My life has tremendously changed when I decided to exists in the light of the present instead of basking in the shadows of doubt.  The question is what's next... Who knows what my next spiritual journey entails; mountains, giants, dragons or more self-discovery or maybe a family The most important lesson that I've learned this year is that the process will be beautiful. A weathered exterior, such as the Earth, gains her majesty from her own emotions, and her bouts with the universe. The reason I consider life so special is due to it being the o

This entry is for my new spiritually clean apartment; there's no place like home. Today, as many days, had its highs and lows, however it kept with the pace of my new beginning. I am embracing the fact that my know-it-all mantra has been left on the side walk like an evicted tenant's belongings. I am also embracing admittance of the defeat of my more younger fragile self and allowing room for a newer improved version of my manly, yet fragile ego. Yes, I laugh at my own jokes. Follow me here. My lover and I had a discussion about taking a leap of faith in order to live your best life. I must admit I was the chair of the committee to trash this topic until he asked a very clear and direct question, "What is your plan?" My mind went into 5,000 directions at one time until a light bulb came on, so I deflected,"What are  WE going to do?" Slick right? He wasn't amused nor was he letting off his stance. I hope he didn't think I was either... We will re

Why is it so hard to have both the love of your life, and a level of success that fills you to the brim??? Normally I would dedicate this entry to a reader, but this entry is really a shot in my own dark... So here's to you Southern Gentleman. Lately I've gotten a grasp back on my life after having a couple of years of wandering aimlessly, searching for answers to questions I already knew, and growing a couple more hairs under my chin. I've started back on the right foot, but there is an emptiness in this eternal bachelor. This void has no name nor does it hurt, but I just know it's there... Just recently I've returned from a writing hiatus, only doing my major scribbling for my personal notebooks and extensive world domination schemes. I skimmed through my files just to get a feel for the flow I left, and found this incomplete entry above and it made me smile. Change is good for the overall picture and for the longest I fought a sense of change in my l