A Generation of Illusions

Today's post is dedicated to what I would like to describe as the Now generation. Presently living in the Now generation I have learned with great misfortune that we live for the emptiness of illusions, and in that emptiness most of us spend our lifetimes searching for what is ultimately the mere foundation upon which we stand; To be, to live and to grow.  To merely live is a divine right given to us by our creator, a right that is referenced in the Preamble of the Constitution, and is taken for granted daily by the value that we place on our own insecure interpretations of what life should look like superficially.

The greatest resolution for this life of illusion is that the illusion is only temporary regardless of how much time has been invested in nurturing the facade, and in the end,  the truth, whatever it may be, will reveal what is truly tangible in the now. Meaning, at the end of the day, or when your light goes out in the world, what its it that truly matters to you? Is it the endless adoration received for making an amount of money in your career, or is it the fact that you simply got married, and feel that your situation is greater than those who chose not wed?   It is up to us to acknowledge our truth with the passion that we used to build the facade in the first place, and by doing that, I believe, we will be better people.

My entry is inspired by the death of a friend, a friend who I would have described as having it all in the material sense, but his sadness was so ingrained in his illusions that he chose to take his own life rather than embrace a flawed existence, and celebrate the imperfection of a human life. He was my friend not because of what he possessed, more so it was the warmth that I felt from his pure soul. A soul that was restless, caring, smart and kind. A soul that in a short time transcended generations in his everyday life; he lived, he loved and he lost, but his losing was more of a gain, to me, the witness. A soul that was tainted by the endless illusions of manhood, sexuality, status, wealth and acceptance.

                                                                                                 

I will never understand his decision to end his life so soon, but I do believe that God has made me a witness to see that illusions are like band aids to a wounded soul. What we as humans perceive as success on the surface is an illusion of what God truly has in store for us.

Human illusions have become the blood in which America's heart pumps. We live in a generation of humans who have morally pigeon-holed the definition of marriage for a certain group of individuals; a man and a woman. We have adopted a distorted moral code that feeds off of the idea of separation and segregation, which births more societal illusion that exhaust progress. The interpretation of the law is completely absent of what is promised to Americans at birth, all three being life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.  On a deeper level the interpretation of the law has become a reason not embrace the truth, and that truth being that homosexuals have been in existence as long as humans have been on this Earth, or in the dawn of the American heartbeat, our forefathers were the savages that they hated. The truth of how we view women is astonishing to me. We view women as a a mere tool for procreation, and it wasn't until the 1973 that there was a law that was passed saying that a woman had the right to decide what she wants to with her own body.

To bind a group of people to a strict moral code is the same vindication that was used to enslave African Americans, it is the same morally fervor that chooses not to increase minimum wages for the working class and it will use it's last dying breath to disrespect it's President who passed a law that promises that ALL individuals have the right to be insured in America. It is a dying movement that has no future so it will spend the rest of it's time as a symbiotic disease draining the hope out of the down trodden. The moral code as stated is a cancer to our country, and we must define a higher level of what's right for us as citizens as well as the future citizens.

I can only speak from my experiences, and what I've seen in my 30 years on this Earth. The bitter illusions in the African American community is no better than the laws used to keep us below the line of poverty, or the laws used to keep our young men incarcerated for the majority of their lives. We would like to believe that we aren't the problem, but we are, and we are killing our future generations by not making better decisions for our families. I see young homosexual brothers living in deep seeded sadness everyday, but ironically they are the individuals who "made" it in their families. Some of these young men are your bosses, fraternity brothers, they are married with kids, they are our doctors, lawyers and thanks to Michael Sams, football players. The perception of homosexuality in the African American community, I feel, is almost as worst as having a family member hooked on harsh drugs. It is treated with the same negligence as they would treat a young woman who got pregnant at a young age. The shame diminishes the love and support, and then the individual is left to go out into the world to "figure it out".

The family is suppose to be a safe haven, the strongest unit of support, the place where you find your identity, and where you go to heal. For most of us it is our first lesson on psychological warfare, the consistent mind fuck of what it means to be a man and the legacy you leave behind vis a vis your family. In the age of information it is astonishing as to how disproportionately the numbers of HIV cases have effected the African American community. The same doctors, lawyers, bosses and football players are still contracting the virus at an alarming rate, and we have to ask ourselves why? The why is how choose to deal with our sons and daughters that decide to come out of the closet, and how their families handle the situation. A decision to discard your child is directly adding to the numbers of young men and women contracting the disease. How we treat sexuality at an early age determines how we will view it as adults. Ignoring the gayness is only delaying the inevitable, and that could have extreme consequences in the wholeness of society.

Embracing the truth can create a positive change for future generations. We will never know the potential of these discarded individuals who died before making peace with themselves, and what effect they could have had on the world. Their legacy is reduced to a numerical statics; ironically the same numerical fate faced by convicted felons.

So for my fired who is resting peacefully in heaven I hear you loud and clear. One day I will see you again, see the smiling face that I once knew and loved, but lost to evilness of negativity. You will always be loved by me, and your life wasn't in vain.